EQUINE I.Q. CHECK

MAY 1998 REINING HORSE ISSUE

Part of Horse Previews Magazine website. Posted on 5/7/98; 2:00:00PM.

EQUINE I.Q. CHECK

Here is hoping this year's horse activity is busy and productive for you. Hope your club registers more horses, transfers more horses, breeds more mares, signs up more members, and gets more publicity than ever before.
Hope your shows have more participants and are well attended.
If you bought or sold a horse recently you probably were involved in a Vet Check to measure the physical soundness of the horse. The tougher task is to measure mental soundness or the horse's intelligence quotient. It is hard to determine an equine psychological profile which can predict how the horse is going to act. Things like horse sense, behavior, and manners often escape the standard Vet Check. So if you are looking for a mental I.Q. Check to make a final decision on your next purchase you are welcome to use the following table of lists. Select from points 1 to 5 on the following 30 mental traits. Do the math. If your prospect scores above too many points you might check your wallet.

A. Horse Sense

a) Cowlick is 1. Between eyes 2. Below eyes 3. Above eyes 4. Over one eye 5. Scabed over

b) Can't distinguish 1. Farrier's instruction 2. Trail markers 3. Park command 4. Lead mare 5. Winner's circle

c) Refuses to 1. Cross stream 2. Cross bridge 3. Cross road 4. Cross-train 5. Cross tie

d) Shys at 1. Show music 2. Announcers 3. Flags and banners 4. Cameras 5. Blue Ribbons

e) Terrified by 1. Trains 2. Boats 3. Planes 4. Automobiles 5. Driving carts

f) Tail & Mane 1. Sheds 2. Has burrs 3. Won't braid 4. Has split ends 5. Snarles

g) Brain Scan Reveals 1. Cracks 2. Bowes 3. Flat line 4. Spikes 5. Nothing

h) Gets 1. Air sick 2. Train sick 3. Sea sick 4. Trailer sick 5. Love sick

i) Gets Lost 1. On trail 2. On track 3. In pasture 4. In round pen 5. In stall

j) Pedigree is 1. Handwritten 2. Misspelled 3. Fabricated 4. Embarassing 5. Forged
B) Behavioral Cues

a) In Stall 1. Paces 2. Kicks wall 3. Cribs 4. Weaves incessantly 5. Casts nightly

b) Breaks a Sweat 1. For apples 2. For horse cookies 3. Spotting the round pen 4. Spotting lunge line 5. Spotting saddle

c) Gaits 1. Crossfiring 2. Rough 3. Uneven to no beat 4. Stumbling 5. On your toes

d) Pole Gaming 1. Shys at poles 2. Bites poles 3. Breaks poles 4. Tramples poles 5. Impales

e) Broke as Colt 1. Starved 2. Rodeoed and laid down 3. 2x4ed and twitched 4. Electric cattle prod 5. Drug behind truck

f) Finicky About 1. Trophies 2. Horse hide 3. Electric trimmers 4. Amateur polo scrimmage 5. Horse whip

g) Attitude 1. Won't budge 2. Attracts insurance 3. Kicks and thrashes 4. Wild and dangerous 5. Bronco

h) Detests Sound of 1. Gun shots 2. Elk bugle 3. Train whistle 4. Auctioneer's voice 5. "Whoa"

i) Falls Asleep 1. While hunting 2. On endurance rides 3. At parades 4. On hot walker 5. At RR crossing

j) At Vet's 1. Plants feet 2. Rears on crosstie 3. Stomps Vet's dog 4. Kicks Vet 5. Bites Vet
C) Manners

a) Chews Up 1. Vinyl 2. Burlap 3. Automobile paint 4. Raccoons 5. Horse blankets

b) Ruins 1. Tack and harness 2. Feed buckets 3. Landscaping 4. Insurance coverage 5. Bank accounts

c) Tramples 1. Water hose 2. Shrubbery 3. Gophers 4. Pets 5. Relatives

d) Likes 1. Mules 2. Porcupines 3. Coyotes and cougars 4. Horse thieves 5. Veterinarians

e) Dislikes 1. Mares 2. Geldings 3. Studs 4. Horse shows 5. People

f) Goes For 1. Horse cookies 2. Rumps on trail 3. Mandatory helmet 4. Insurance premiums 5. Low points

g) Goes Against 1. Discipline 2. The grain 3. Stepping up 4. Blue ribbons 5. High points

h) Training Discrepancies 1. Busted John Lyons round pen 2. Ate Will Howe training tapes 3. Linda Tellington-Jones dropout 4. Sued by local trainer 5. Can't lead after 120 days training

i) Throws Rider 1. Into gate post 2. On to barbed wire 3. Over edge of cliff trail 4. On to pavement 5. At horse show

j) Knocks Over 1. Carts 2. Poles 3. Mail boxes 4. Barrels 5. Judges

TOTALS __________ __________ __________ __________ __________

GRAND TOTAL__________

SCORE: 30-50: You paid too much 50-80: You paid way too much 80-100: You are courting Chapter Eleven 100-120: You have the insanity defense. 120-150: People see you coming.

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A. Horse Sense
a) Cowlick is	1. Between eyes	2. Below eyes	3. Above eyes	4. Over one eye	5. Scabed over
b) Can't distinguish	1. Farrier's instruction	2. Trail markers	3. Park command 4. Lead mare	5. Winner's circle
c) Refuses to	1. Cross stream	2. Cross bridge	3. Cross road	4. Cross-train	5. Cross tie
d) Shys at	1. Show music	2. Announcers	3. Flags and banners	4. Cameras	5. Blue Ribbons
e) Terrified by	1. Trains	2. Boats	3. Planes	4. Automobiles	5. Driving carts
f) Tail & Mane	1. Sheds	2. Has burrs	3. Won't braid	4. Has split ends	5. Snarles
g) Brain Scan Reveals	1. Cracks	2. Bowes	3. Flat line	4. Spikes	5. Nothing
h) Gets	1. Air sick	2. Train sick	3. Sea sick	4. Trailer sick	5. Love sick
i) Gets Lost	1. On trail	2. On track	3. In pasture	4. In round pen	5. In stall
j) Pedigree is	1. Handwritten	2. Misspelled	3. Fabricated	4. Embarassing	5. Forged
B) Behavioral Cues
a) In Stall	1. Paces	2. Kicks wall	3. Cribs	4. Weaves incessantly	5. Casts nightly
b) Breaks a Sweat	1. For apples	2. For horse cookies	3. Spotting the round pen 4. Spotting lunge line	5. Spotting saddle
c) Gaits	1. Crossfiring	2. Rough	3. Uneven to no beat	4. Stumbling	5. On your toes
d) Pole Gaming	1. Shys at poles	2. Bites poles	3. Breaks poles	4. Tramples poles	5. Impales
e) Broke as Colt	1. Starved	2. Rodeoed and laid down	3. 2x4ed and twitched	4. Electric cattle prod	5. Drug behind truck
f) Finicky About	1. Trophies	2. Horse hide	3. Electric trimmers	4. Amateur polo scrimmage	5. Horse whip
g) Attitude	1. Won't budge	2. Attracts insurance	3. Kicks and thrashes	4. Wild and dangerous	5. Bronco
h) Detests Sound of	1. Gun shots	2. Elk bugle	3. Train whistle	4. Auctioneer's voice	5. "Whoa"
i) Falls Asleep	1. While hunting	2. On endurance rides	3. At parades	4. On hot walker	5. At RR crossing
j) At Vet's	1. Plants feet	2. Rears on crosstie	3. Stomps Vet's dog	4. Kicks Vet	5. Bites Vet
C) Manners
a) Chews Up	1. Vinyl	2. Burlap	3. Automobile paint	4. Raccoons	5. Horse blankets
b) Ruins	1. Tack and harness	2. Feed buckets	3. Landscaping	4. Insurance coverage	5. Bank accounts
c) Tramples	1. Water hose	2. Shrubbery	3. Gophers	4. Pets	5. Relatives
d) Likes	1. Mules	2. Porcupines	3. Coyotes and cougars	4. Horse thieves	5. Veterinarians
e) Dislikes	1. Mares	2. Geldings	3. Studs	4. Horse shows	5. People
f) Goes For	1. Horse cookies	2. Rumps on trail	3. Mandatory helmet	4. Insurance premiums	5. Low points
g) Goes Against	1. Discipline	2. The grain	3. Stepping up	4. Blue ribbons	5. High points
h) Training Discrepancies	1. Busted John Lyons round pen	2. Ate Will Howe training tapes	3. Linda Tellington-Jones dropout	4. Sued by local trainer	5. Can't lead after 120 days training
i) Throws Rider	1. Into gate post	2. On to barbed wire	3. Over edge of cliff trail	4. On to pavement	5. At horse show
j) Knocks Over	1. Carts	2. Poles	3. Mail boxes	4. Barrels	5. Judges
TOTALS	__________	__________	__________	__________	__________
GRAND TOTAL__________
SCORE:	30-50:	You paid too much	50-80:	You paid way too much	80-100:	You are courting Chapter Eleven	100-120:	You have the insanity defense.	120-150:	People see you coming.